Friday Morning Funnies

The Grasshopper and the Frog

Sometime in the middle of the night in the wee hours of March 13, I woke up to feeling an insect on the middle of my forehead. It was definitely not a mosquito and being pitch black in the tent I immediately sat up and tried to shake off the offending creature, at which point I felt it crawl into my hair.

Being terrified as I had no idea if this was a spider or a centipede or what it was I started screaming and turned on my phone and had my poor now awake husband inspect the back of my hair for some creepy crawly. We couldn’t find the creature and I tried to settle back into unsteady sleep. Then the thing landed on my leg.

I was able to find a small tan grasshopper in the corner of the tent this time. He was kind of cute and I know that they don’t bite so I left him alone. He hopped back on my arm just as I was drifting back to sleep. Jiminy Crickets.

I woke up in the early morning feeling the slight weight of something on my arm and expected to see my little grasshopper friend. I was greeted by a small frog on my arm in the same spot instead. WTF?

“Did you eat the grasshopper?” I asked the frog, who just looked at me and croaked. I tried to get him out of the tent but he hopped off my arm and scurried under my suitcase. Don’t frogs eat mosquitos? I already made a deal with the fire ants where I don’t kill them and they don’t bite me, which seems to be going well thus far. But I have no mercy for the bloodsuckers so if something want to eat them instead I’m fine with it.

I didn’t see either creature again until yesterday morning, when I found what looked like the same small frog in my backpack. “You don’t really want to hitch a ride to 7 Eleven, now do you?” I said as I grabbed the little guy and took him out of my bag. The frog tried to hop back in my backpack, I tried to grab him and then he hopped on my arm. “I don’t mind you around but I’m not going to kiss you or anything.” I said to the frog. “With my husband it would be very awkward if you turned into a prince.” I grabbed him and put him on the ground, where he then crawled under the corner of the tent.

Much later in the day I went to 7 Eleven and unzipped my backpack to take out my laptop. The same tan half grown grasshopper I hadn’t seen in two weeks was inside my bag in the same pouch where the frog had been in the morning. WTF?

I tried to grab him but then the grasshopper hopped on my husband’s arm. “Can eat!” Ka joked.

“Don’t kill him! That’s my friend!” I told Ka back. I knew he was joking anyways. The grasshopper hopped away and we didn’t know where he went. But then as I was putting my laptop back in my bag I saw that the grasshopper was in my backpack again. “You want to hitch a ride back to the tent?” I questioned him. Maybe he missed his friend the frog, who apparently hadn’t eaten him. Maybe the grasshopper and frog are the same shape shifting spirit guide, as I have yet to see them at the same time just in the same place. Weirdness.

I contrast this with the same shit different day political theater of the screens. Perhaps because Spring has sprung in the Northern hemisphere I seem to be noticing a lot of people who are tuning out and going back to nature and perhaps in person meetings. But as so much of modern life seems dependant in some way on the almighty Internet, how far can most of us really get away from the screens?

Regarding the Signal chat leak thing, it seems to be a limited hangout and perhaps even an intentionally manufactured controversy. The giveaway for that is that they spent no time mentioning or criticizing the country that cannot be named. We sure do fund a lot of terrorists on their behalf it seems and then the bombs to kill everybody else.

This always looked like an inside job to me. I have no problem calling Hamas terrorists as I think people that kill innocent people are terrorists. So why do we fund them like we did with the “Moderate rebels” or whatever they are in Syria who are now slaughtering entire Christian and Alawite families?

Perhaps we should let the AI feed on itself until its echo chamber fades away entirely…

I’m happy that 25 states thus far are trying to ban geoengineering. Unfortunately I seem to recall that Tenessee already did and then there were reports that they were still spraying.

We found the power generator under the pyramids! My question is if they have technology that can scan several miles underground, then why is it supposedly so hard to find Hamas tunnels without bombing everything to smithereens?

I like some of these better than the originals! The Gemini party is very apt

Colonizing whore is my top pick…

How many warships normally sink? I’m not that superstitious but I think I’d stop putting the cat on boats after the first two sank for the sake of the rest of the crew…

Here’s a photo update on the restaurant/minimart. The yellow floor paint is slowly growing on me and from the side it definitely stands out. If the goal was to paint the minimart area in colors that say minimart without even a sign that says minimart, the mission is accomplished!

Back to nature for me…or something like that…

Buy me a ko-fi